The holidays can bring out the best…and worst in people. For some the holidays are all about reconnecting with family and friends. For others, the holidays are a reminder of family and friends that have passed on, or pissed us off. Here are a few tips on how to make the most the holiday season…

I was at a Christmas party this past week, and one of my friends broke down and started crying. She is having a tough time this holiday season. She’s reached out to her children and they have not returned her calls. She asks herself, “Why don’t they call me?” “Why are they being this way?” “Why don’t they want me in their lives?” Maybe her kids are ungrateful and selfish brats, and maybe they’re perfectly justified in their actions because they view her as a horrible mother. Whatever the reasons are, she’s asking herself the wrong questions.

Every year, my boyfriend Doug decorates our house with Christmas lights. It’s not quite the over-the-top caliber of National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation, but it is amazing display. Doug has enjoyed doing Christmas lights for years. He uses a special computer program that coordinates music and dancing lights. The music is projected through a small speaker so you can hear the display if you’re in front of it, but he also uses an FM tuner so you can hear the music should you decide to stay in your car to watch. Over the years of doing this, Doug has programmed 90 minutes of music for the lights to “dance” to. Each minute of music takes about 4 hours to program.